你有什么不开心的事？说出来让大家开心一下。
1. Is there anything that makes you unhappy? Share it with everyone and let’s all have a good laugh.

谁欺负你了告诉我，我帮着他一起欺负你。
2. If someone has bullied you, tell me and I’ll help them bully you together.

女人是水做的，男人是泥做的，李俊基李宇春都是水泥做的。
3. Women are made of water, men are made of mud, and Lee Jun-ki and Li Yuchun are both made of cement.

为何我的眼中总饱含泪水？因为我装逼装得深沉。
4. Why are there always tears in my eyes? Because I pretend to be deep.

见过丑的，没见过这么丑的。乍一看挺丑，仔细一看更丑！
5. I’ve seen ugly people, but I’ve never seen someone as ugly as you. At first glance, you’re quite ugly, but upon closer inspection, you’re even uglier!

在超市里，看见一只五花大绑着的螃蟹从18.9元的冰柜里往28.9元的柜子里爬，我泪流满面，你太TM有上进心了!
6. In the supermarket, I saw a crab, tied up in five different ways, crawling from the 18.9 yuan freezer to the 28.9 yuan cabinet. I was moved to tears; you’re so ambitious!

对我来说，你是黑暗中的灯泡，饥饿中的面包，冬天里的棉袄，夏天里的雪糕。你是我今生唯一的宝。
7. To me, you are the light bulb in the dark, the bread in hunger, the cotton jacket in winter, and the

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